Displays on page: Awakening to the Cycles of LIfe

Lessons about Life Direction and Purpose

I’ve struggled with knowing myself and my place in the world since my late teens. I never felt I was taught how to decide which direction to take my life. Somehow, as a 16 year old, I was expected to know what to do with the rest of my life, without anything to base that decision on. As a college student I changed my major several times, unable to decide on anything that really moved me. As an adult, I find myself in the same place as my 18 year old self – like a teenager who’s never really been able to decide what I want to be when I grow up.

The Life Cycle Living workshop showed me that I had missed an essential phase in my life that would’ve allowed me to understand myself better, to move forward in my life with direction and clarity. It gave me context to that which I knew to be true, but couldn’t formulate into words. It’s not that this program gave any answers on how to change this, but I was able to feel like the stuckness in my life isn’t related to something I have failed to do, or to a personal failure. I now understand it’s because the society that we live in expects our children to jump from puberty to adulthood without any support to understand what that even means. This realization made me very angry and also very upset, because so many of us are missing pieces of ourselves that are necessary to be who we really are. And we all have so much to offer as our true, authentic selves.

Life Cycle Living has left me wanting to pursue how I can move through this missing stage. My local fire community seems hungry for more of this medicine as well. We were passionate about brainstorming how to bring a supportive way of aging to our community. We are excited to become involved in the next steps of what Life Cycle Living has to offer each of us. We want this not just so we can heal ourselves individually, but to be able to extend the gifts of Life Cycle Living to all of us, to grow stronger together. Like a community. Like a village.

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The Gift of Simplicity in Life

When I go about my day, I’m mostly dealing with concerns about my work: how to plan my work and schedule and whether or not I will be able to take care of this or that detail.

When I go through normal western life choices and then step into something like Life Cycle Living, it is so obvious that my mind and my concerns pull me far away from the simplicity of life, that kind of aware and present life that, at some point or another, our ancestors lived. Life Cycle Living made it very clear how simple and satisfying life can be. Not that any of my questions were answered specifically; however, sometimes knowing the right question to ask is more important than having the answer.

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Life Cycle Living Sparks Important, Beautiful Questions

Beautiful questions often provide more value than quick and easy answers. Those who have had a chance to participate in Life Cycle Living weekends — two-day conversations exploring the natural stages of a human life — have raised many important, beautiful questions.

How is the path to adulthood affected when a person misses a critical factor of development during their teenage years? How does that affect their ability to mature and show up fully grounded in adulthood?

How is our society missing out on the gifts of elders? Are our seniors able to bring their communities the wisdom gleaned from their numerous years of experience?

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The Role of Parent

I got a lot from participating in the Life Cycle Living workshop. By reflecting upon my current stage in life and my role as a parent, I realized that I needed to go back and do some inner work to deal with earlier stages in life, stages during which my natural development as a human being had been blocked. For instance, while growing up in Brazil and when I was just 11 years old, I had to take over a parenting role for my younger brother, and so I lost out on fully embracing my childhood at that time. Paradoxically, even though I took this ‘mature’ role as a child, I realized that in some way I had retained a degree of immaturity.

I have since worked on this, including taking an Emotional Wisdom workshop facilitated by Prema Sheerin, one of the Sacred Fire Community Lifeways providers. This is allowing me to be more fully present as a father for my children and as a man for my community. I am also hoping that we will get enough interest to start regular Men’s Fires around our hearth, just as the women are gathering around the Fire every month.

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Elder wisdom

One of the wonderful things that came out of our Life Cycle Living workshop here in New Freedom, PA (USA) is remembering the importance of the elders within our community. As part of their role in service to the younger generations, elders are asked to share the wisdom gained from their life experiences. As a result of our discussion, we hosted a Story Telling Fire, with participants ranging from age 5 to 75. We laughed, cried and learned as people shared stories from their own lives, as well as from different Native American traditions. We decided on the spot we will do this again!

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Sparks: Coming Soon

Around the Fire

Around the Fire is the newsletter of Sacred Fire and is published monthly.

If you’re new to Sacred Fire, here are three ways to learn more:

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Around the Fire is published by the Sacred Fire Outreach team:

Director
Sharon Brown

Strategic Direction
Karen Fernandez
Lawrence Messerman
Sharon Brown

Editorial Team
Erin Everett
Christine Staub
Linda Azar

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Sally Casper
Britt Espinosa

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Leticia Gamboa
Sylvia Law

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Erin Everett
Abigail Murray-Nikkel

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Linda Felch

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Heidi Griswold

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Living Magic LLP

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